Behavior

Survivor

April 2013

Lonely

Ever since I was harassed out of high school by people who were my “friends”, I’ve become extremely mindful of who I choose to surround me in my life. In fact, I don’t even make friends anymore because I’d rather be alone than hurting. I realize this isn’t a healthy habit, and it’s something I’m working on.
If you’re a survivor of abuse, be mindful of the people you surround yourself with. There is a technique I learned in counseling that has helped:

1. Think of all the friends you’ve had in your lifetime- even in childhood
2. Make two lists- one of all the good friends you’ve had and another of all the friends who had a negative impact on your life
3. Next to every person on the list, write down their most outstanding characteristics- you should see a pattern developing
4. Once completing this, recognize the pattern of characteristics each list holds. When making a new friend- analyze their characteristics. If they hold the characteristics of the list that negatively impacted your life, the likeliness that they will have a negative impact has increased.
5. Try looking for friends that hold characteristics of the good friends you’ve previously experienced or have now

This Will Pass

My first day at college, I was paralyzed with fear that I would be sexually abused again or raped. My father told me right before he left, “this too shall pass”. In art therapy, I decided to draw his words and date it with the day I considered myself a survivor♥